It’s one thing to dislike your job, relationship or other parts of your life but it’s another to feel physically ill walking into work, or not wanting to come home.
Having experienced both of these in my life & having had many discussions with my clients I can identify that these toxic people/environments really affect our self worth & confidence.
This toxic energy impacts & infects every part of our lives, which in turn stop us believing in ourselves & our future.
So what do I mean when I say toxic
I’m sure we have all met people who’s initial impact make us feel inadequate. I don’t mean just their presence, but how they treat us. How their expectations of others is centered around their own needs been met.
These toxic behaviours can be displayed in our relationships, workplace & within our own families
They diminish our self worth by encouraging us to question our ability, our looks, or even our opinions. It can be very subtle or at times very aggressive
Individuals create drama in their lives or are surrounded by it
They try to manipulate or control others
They use others to meet their needs. It’s always about them (such as “narcissistic” behaviour)
They may be extremely critical of themselves and others & are jealous and envious of other people’s achievements, as they believe they are entitled to these.
They are obsessive about achieving more & more or having more & more, never satisfied with what they have or being in the present moment.
This can be all very believable & they can be very charming allowing us to believe we are not up to their expectations, their views & their opinions are right.
However much we give, it is never enough. It’s never right!! Their expectations slowly erode away at our self-esteem
So how do we deal with toxicity?
It’s the little things that can make a difference & you do not have to feel this way
Evaluate your position
What I mean by this is look at the situation or relationship & highlight
What it means to you.
What do you get from it?
What do you have to contribute to this?
Is this an equal balance?
What if anything do you have to sacrifice?
Identify & remove the barriers
Start to identify what stops this relationship being equal
What things are stopping you from changing this?
Create new boundaries
Once we have identified the barriers we can start to create new boundaries –
The first thing maybe to stop being negative about ourselves & treat ourselves with a little kindness. Readdress the balance of the relationships & for more toxic environments we may even think of removing ourselves all together
So in summary
We don’t have accept the toxicity in our lives we can identify it, change it, or even remove it
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If you would like to discuss how toxicity is impacting on your life or would like to find out more about Life Coaching please feel free to contact me for your free 30-minute telephone consultation
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It is about having an open and honest conversation, in a safe confidential environment where you can reflect, revaluate & respond to your needs & put yourself first to ensure you achieve all your goals in life & live your best life.
Coaching is not about judging or criticising but learning how to unlock your full potential, raising your awareness of the strengths & talents you already have. It is about creating a shift from where you are to where you want to be.
Please read my Client Feedback for examples and feedback on how I have been able to help clients.