Man is lying in bed with girlfriend and thinking

Is your relationship under pressure?
How do you decide if it’s time to call it a day?
Divorce is a scary life changing event that creates pain & heartache so how do you decide that there is no other option?

Time for Change.
There are two people in a marriage so if its not working for either of you its not working.  But that doesn’t mean you have to through in the towel straight away. Women usually put their needs to the back of the queue, looking after everyone else first however this is not healthy for you or your marriage.  Something has to change but it doesn’t mean divorce. The first action is to be honest, firstly with yourself around the areas that aren’t making you happy & secondly with your partner, identifying what you want & need from the relationship.

This can be a gift. Don’t rush in you don’t have to make any decisions straight away. Take time to get to know you again & don’t force any decisions. Clarity will come if you can relax & be honest with yourself.

No Regrets.
It is always better to be honest & try every option before you take action but if you have tried everything  & you still feel the same way then you may have your answer

Wishing your partner wasn’t there.
Wishing they were on a business trip or just somewhere else. This is a very normal reaction for relationships that aren’t working but don’t spend your life wishing your life away. You can move on so it may be time to take action & think about moving out

Pay attention.
Sometimes it is our physical body that tells us things aren’t right before we even acknowledge we aren’t happy.  Have you been internalising the pain. In my research lots of us have physical illnesses, rashes, panic attacks, constant colds, & feel totally exhausted before we listen to our inner voice as to what is really happening.

Health & Happiness.
Some divorces can be seen as a selfish act however sometimes this is the only option for your own health. When you take time, quiet your mind & be totally honest with yourself you will know if you need to leave. Your Partner may never understand but as long as you are honest with yourself & know the reasons why you can’t stay then you can look upon this act more as a life affirming choice rather than been cruel & heartless

What will the Children think?
If you are ask yourself would you want your children to be in a relationship that made them feel this way.  How can you be the best version of yourself for them if you are living a lie? This does not mean be heartless but show them by example by respecting yourself to take action. You may be interested in my previous articles that could help with children & divorce

The Innocent Party. Do the children suffer?

How to help your Teenager through Divorce

It doesn’t matter if professionals, family members, friends tell you what & how you should manage your relationship it is your life & we only get one. They are not living your life day by day. So listen to your inner voice, don’t rush, take your time, try all options and when you are ready to make a decision make it for you.

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